What is a Dad?

Something I wrote at my fathers funeral in 1997

What is a Dad?
He's the one who's there when you fall off your bike and says try again,
He's the one who's there when you don't want to get caught,
He's the one who's there when you need that special advice,
He's the one who's there when you finally marry the right girl,
When your young you think he's always wrong,
And when your grown you find out he was right,
When I was young I said when I grow up I'm not going to do things that way,
When I was young I said he was tough,
Now I'm grown and I see him in the mirror every morning and I realize I'm becoming more like him each day,
What is a Dad?
He's my best friend and I'll miss him dearly, I can only hope that I will mean as much to my family as he does to his,
Dad I Love You, Tim

THROUGH THE VALLEY

THROUGH THE VALLEY

I’ve set and thought about this for 9 months, and I think back over the struggles we’ve had and all the tears and pain. Now the tears are different, we’ve have been through so much over the past 4 years. I can’t seem to forget the night of July 7 2006 when one of the most important people in my life attempted suicide, my world was rocked, my beautiful daughter wanted to end her life.

We had been going thru some strange times, she had become a cutter and we didn’t understand why someone with so much going for her would feel so much pain and anger that she would have to harm herself to feel better about life. We tried to talk to her but she just closed herself off from us.

Then that night.

Over the next few months I didn’t understand why God would let this happen to us or her, and what was the reason? I prayed for help and answers and it seemed nothing came. This continued for the next 2 years, in and out of a facility, 2 more suicide attempts, counseling, and reaching out for help. I became bitter, argued and fought with God, almost to the point of giving up. Then slowly things changed, the cutting stopped and she became more open to family and life.

Well things have definitely changed, she has grown into a beautiful women. I mentioned nine months, well now she is having a baby; my little girl who has been through so much is having her own little girl.

Through this time God found a way to speak to us, through music God let us know he was there. Several years ago we had met Mark Hall of Casting Crowns, at that time we were working with youth, Mark had told me that if I ever needed anything to let him know, of course he was talking about youth work but, what none of us knew at the time that the band would help us in ways only God could have been involved in. It seemed that their music mirrored our lives, with songs like “Does anybody hear her”, “Set me free”, “Prodigal”, and the one that touched us most “Praise you in the storm”. Two albums seem to speak to us, I wrote Mark and told him all this and thanked him and the group for praying for us and that God had truly been at work through them. So when you think God is not there and you begin to believe that God is “The angry little boy with magnifying glass” remember he lets us go through these ordeals for a reason, maybe to strengthen a marriage or show a hard headed man that no matter what, He is still there. God has truly blessed us, and been there even though we thought He wasn’t. Even though we didn’t trust and thought about turning away we didn’t, we knew deep inside God is always there and HE knows the time and place to move in our lives.

Now the tears of pain and heartache have been replaced by tears of joy and happiness, I am so proud of who she has become and the fact that she is bringing another beautiful little girl into our lives and the world. As I post this today my beautiful granddaughter was born Jan. 17, 2011. Baby and momma are doing great and Papa is eating it up. 

"Yes tho I walk through the valley of death I will free no evil for you are with me." Psalms 23                 Dedicated to Kristan and Emori

Married Life

Whoever said marriage was easy must have only been married for two minutes. Believe me there is nothing easy about marriage it is hard work. If you want to make a marriage last you have to work at it, there is a lot of give and take in marriage. everybody has heard of the book "Men are from Mars and women are from Venus" John gray couldn't have put it better, we are so different in everything. If men think they can ever understand a woman, there wrong, we'll will never truly understand each other. God created us to live together, and if we were to much alike we'd never be able to survive, there needs to be that opposition in the thought process to keep us both working together. If young couples today want to make their lives together, they have to remember to give and take, and yes there will be arguments and disagreements, but you have to understand that these things will happen and we have to keep trying. Women need nurturing, loving touches, hugs, caring for, security, stability, and the occasional new pair of shoes, and well men need food, sex, the remote, and... that's all I can think of right now.
Just know, don't give in to defeat make that marriage work and as long as you keep God in your marriage you can MAKE IT WORK.